Eviction

“…He sent me to bind up the broken hearted…to bestow on them a crown of beauty instead of ashes, the oil of gladness instead of mourning, and a garment of praise instead of a spirit of despair. They will be called oaks of righteousness, a planting of the Lord for the display of his splendor.” Isaiah 61: 1, 3

My July 4th was very different from most of yours. Instead of picnics, parades and fireworks, I watched as one widow's house after another was demolished by large graders. These massive machines came without warning early that Monday morning and ran over house after house without any care as to who or what was inside. As the concrete walls fell large swells of dust and concrete particles filled the air. It was suffocating. People were running to get as much out of their homes as they could before the whole house was destroyed by these large unyielding machines. The military in full riot gear surrounded the quarters machine guns in hand making sure the people had no choice but to watch as their house and most of their belongings were crushed and buried in large piles of rubble. I held widows as they cried and wailed. In that moment all I could do was cry and stand in that terrible pain with them.

That night many of them slept outside on the street...homeless...without water...without food...without anything. I received call after call from them...their voices trembled...they asked me what to do...where they should go. If it was only one, we could compensate them, but our ministry had 46 families homeless overnight. For us it was a devastating disaster of monumental proportions. Suzan, Annet and I cried...large tears rolling down our cheeks for these women we love so much. It just seemed so overwhelming...how do we find housing for that many people in one night? We felt as helpless as they did.

On Tuesday, July 5th we contacted the US office of Dorcas Widows Fund and told Lisa about the massive disaster in Nakawa/Naguru Quarters. She was as shocked and saddened as we were, but we formulated a plan. She quickly let the donors know about the widow’s homelessness and they responded. Immediately she sent $5,000 USD, which DWF used to pay 3 months rent on temporary houses for each of the women who were evicted. It took about a week, but eventually all 46 of the women were in some type of structure and no longer on the street. The women were amazed that our little ministry was able to love and support them...all of them, not just some. We rescued them in their darkest hour of need. We filled a gap that no one...no one was willing to fill for them. We saved them from being homeless...we loved them when they felt the most unloved...we stood with them in their pain and helped them find a way out of it. I can’t tell you how awesome and beautiful it is to love like Jesus loves.

The following week, my parents came to visit the widows for the first time. Emotionally, the ladies had been to hell and back, but they remained determined to welcome them with all the love they had left to give. So, they came early that day to cook for them…to make a feast for them. They dressed in their gomesi’s they received from Dorcas Widows Fund last Christmas and greeted my parents like they were royalty from another place. They knelt and hugged them…kissed them and told them that they loved them. Even though the pain and heartache of the last week was still fresh, they chose joy. It was hard for them…it ached at times to choose joy over this painful sorrow, but they did it. They sang and danced and ate. It was an incredible display of courage. Inside my head, I was hearing the words of a chorus I used to sing in Sunday school…” WhenI am weak and he is strong, Yes, Jesus loves me, yes Jesus loves me.” I am convinced it is only God that gave them the courage to love and give and dance and sing in the midst of the great pain they were feeling. I knew because at that moment they were displaying his splendor and it was glorious.

As the party came to a close, I gave my parents some of the money you donated and asked them to give 50,000 Ugsh ($24) to each woman. As they announced your gift, some widows screamed…some ran around…some danced and some just fell to their knees and cried. They could not believe it. They could not believe that anyone would notice their pain and be so willing to give them so much money at one time. It was a rejoicing I will never forget.

The next week, we met with the widows again. They came ready and excited to share what that 50,000 Ugsh meant to them.

One woman, Jenifer, started her testimony by shaking her head and crying. She then told us that as she was cooking potatoes for the feast her mouth began to water as she had not eaten in a couple of days. So, she took some of the potatoes and ate them. As she ate them large swells of guilt came over her as her children were at home with nothing to eat and here she was eating potatoes. She was feeling so unworthy…as a mother, as a provider…in fact she was beating herself up inside all during the party. Then when my father announced that she would receive the 50,000 Ugsh she almost fainted. She ran to my father and put her arms around his neck and cried. She left that meeting and bought enough food to feed her children for a month. God had heard her cry and lifted her out of her pit of despair.

Another woman, Justine, told us that her daughter had been abandoned by her husband and was about to give birth. Before receiving the 50,000 Ugsh she had no money to pay for the birth of the child. In fact the daughter’s due date was the date of my parent’s party, but her daughter was still feeling no pain, so Justine went to the party. In receiving that money Justine knew it would cover the birth of the child at the government hospital. So, a couple days later a baby girl was born in a local hospital, but with no outstanding debt. Justine was so happy and so grateful that she named the child after my mother. When she finished testifying she danced and sang and marveled at how God provides.

Each widow has her own story and I could write for pages if I told them all, but please know that God is using your dollars and donations. Real lives of real women are being rescued and loved. Thank you so much for all you have done for these women. However, we are not done yet, we are still hoping to build a more permenant widows community for these women. If God so moves you, please consider donating to the Dorcas Widows Fund and make this a reality.

May God continue to bless you…God is using you to change the lives of those he loves!

A Promise Kept

Yesterday morning Agnes lost her battle with AIDS and cancer, but regained her freedom from pain and is now in eternal peace. Agnes had been sick for many years and in the last year her pain had become unbearable. She had multiple ulcers in her stomach from the cancer drugs which caused a great fire in her belly anytime she ate anything. Her head ached daily from lack of food and her digestive system either was blocked or would cause her to have diarrhea for hours at a time. She had become bone thin and finally could no longer take care of herself. For the last 2 months she has been bedridden in the hospital. Her daughter who is 15 has been taking care of her. She slept on a mat below her mother's hospital bed wondering which day she would see her mother die. It has been a painful road for both of them, but God has held them close every step of the way. The day before Agnes died, she was in pain but full of peace...a strange combination...one only possible when you are in the palm of God.

Her daughter was at her bedside crying...begging her mother not to die...asking her what she will do with her body...how will I get a coffin? how will I transport your body? pay for the burial? Calmly, Agnes looked into her daughter's eyes and said, "Don't worry about any of that. Jesus told me that he will provide the coffin, that a car will be sent with petrol already in it and there will be nothing you have to do." Her daughter just shook her head and thought that her mother was talking nonsense.

The next day Agnes died. Shortly after her death, Meeting Point (another NGO that helped Agnes with her HIV treatment) paid the bill for everything in the hospital including preparing the body for burial and the coffin. Another woman from Agnes' church was prompted by the holy spirit to give her family's truck free of charge in order to transport her body to Northern Uganda. And like Jesus promised the woman put a full tank of fuel in the truck before handing over the keys to Agnes' family. The only thing that remained was to find a beautiful dress to bury her mother in...as the girl looked in her mother's things, the only nice dress Agnes had was the Gomesi given to her last Christmas by Dorcas Widows Fund. Just like Jane, Agnes was buried in the beautiful dress we provided for her at Christmas. She looked so beautiful...mostly because she was at peace...no more pain...no more sorrow...now only the joy of heaven. Dancing with the savior at the wedding feast in the most beautiful dress....

Her daughter was awestruck to see the miracles God provided...to see how much he loves the widow and the orphan. Now the girl will stay with a priest who was close to the family. She will be taken care of and loved by the family of God. Isn't it amazing to watch God keep his promises???

In loving memory of Agnes Oyio...a widow who was dearly loved by God.

Lost and Found

“Hope deferred makes the heart sick, but a longing fulfilled is a tree of life.” Proverbs 13:12

I know what it’s like to hope for something for not just months, but for years…to spend over 20 years hoping that God will fulfill my deepest desire. My desire has yet remained unfulfilled and I can attest that my heart has been incredibly undeniably sick. It is a pain only fellow ‘wait-ers’ can understand. Your heart literally hurts every day all the time. There is no relief…no comfort until that longing is satisfied. Maybe that is our human nature or maybe that is the curse of hoping for something that may never be ours. Those of you who long desperately for a child…or to be married…or to have a stable job…or to have peace in your family…know what I am talking about.

Since, I know what it is like to be nearly 40 and unmarried, I know what it feels like to be heartsick over a hope deferred. Maybe that is why I connect so deeply with the widows…I know that pain of longing for something to be different…I know how hopeless life sometimes feels. Most of our widow meetings, we focus so much on what it feels like to have our hope deferred that we sometimes miss the second half of the proverb…”but a longing fulfilled is a tree of life.” It is the hope that Jesus will provide a “tree of life” for our deepest longing that keeps us hoping in the first place. I mean isn’t Jesus called “the tree of life?”

Last Thursday, Rosemary got her “tree of life” and it was spectacularly beautiful.

Around this time last year, I received a frantic call telling me that Rosemary had tried to kill herself. I was heart broken to hear that she had felt so alone and so discouraged that her only option seemed to be to end it all. Several of us went to see her after she was discharged from the hospital. Her suicide attempt was unsuccessful, but it was clear that her pain was still real and overwhelming. Her oldest son had fallen into the wrong crowd and had been stealing money from her. When he came home drunk, he was beating her up. The aunties on her husband’s side had kidnapped her first-born daughter and she hadn’t seen her or heard from her in 25 years. All her attempts to find her daughter after all these years had ended in heartbreak. One of her young nieces had just been raped while staying in the village. Her other daughter had gotten pregnant by her boyfriend and now her and the new baby were living with her. Not to mention that her own diabetes had been causing her much pain and discomfort. All these intense problems were just too much for Rosemary. She had long since stopped coming to the Dorcas Widows Meetings, as she just couldn’t get the energy to come. Fortunately, several widows had taken to visiting her. They tried to encourage her as best they could, but that fateful night she just lost hope…her heart became sick and she just gave up.

After the suicide attempt, we all became very involved in Rosemary’s life. We helped her keep food in the house, we helped find a way to keep her safe from her son, and we tried to help her find a place for her niece to receive treatment. We also encouraged her to get back involved with her church and with the Dorcas Widows Ministry. She did both of those things and slowly by slowly we saw Rosemary come back to life. The overwhelming spirit of despair that hung over her life was sent away and replaced again with hope…the hope that Jesus would stand beside her…that he would comfort her…that he would begin to unravel all her problems.

So, it was that Rosemary stood in front of the women on Thursday…stretched her hands toward heaven and just cried. At first, I was concerned that her heart had become too sick again, but when she began to talk I realized that these were now tears of overwhelming joy. She said, “Ladies, God had done a miracle…something I never, never believed possible. What I wanted most has happened.” Then she put her head in her hands and cried. We all sat there dumbfounded wondering what had happened that had made her this happy. She looked up again and said, “My long lost daughter is alive and has been found.” All our mouths dropped open…all eyes became wide…then almost all at once a loud cheer erupted from all of us. She just stood in the midst of us looking up at the sky with huge tears rolling down her cheeks.

After we quieted ourselves down, she began to tell us what had happened. “My pastor encouraged us to spend 3 weeks fasting and praying. So I decided to fast and pray, but the only thing I asked God for was my first-born daughter. I haven’t seen her for 25 years and I just wanted to know where she was and if she was fine.” At the end of Rosemary’s fast, the pastor’s wife came to her house. She had rushed there and seemed out of breath when she arrived. Rosemary invited her in not knowing what had caused this sudden visit. The pastor’s wife smiled and shook her head, her eyes filling up with tears. Rosemary asked her what was wrong. The pastor’s wife then said, “You daughter contacted us and wants to talk to you, but we had no way to reach you as you don’t have a phone.” Rosemary said she felt immediately weak and fell into the chair behind her. “Please, please don’t tease me about this. I am not strong enough. Are you sure? Are you really sure she is MY daughter?” The pastor’s wife then confirmed the name of her daughter and several other details that would indeed leave no doubt that she had found her long lost daughter. Rosemary couldn’t believe it.

Then the Pastor’s wife gave her a phone and told her to wait, as her daughter would call her shortly. A while later the phone began to ring. She was so overcome with emotion, she had her other daughter answer it. It was her long lost daughter calling from Sweden as that is where she had been finally found. Rosemary took the phone and just wept calling her daughter’s name over and over. Her 30-year-old daughter also wept saying “mommy, mommy, mommy” over and over again. After they had cried with each other, they began to unravel what had kept them apart.

Twenty-five years ago Rosemary had left her then 4-year-old daughter with her sister while she went into town. A group of men showed up at the sister’s home and kidnapped her daughter by gunpoint. The sister almost died at their hands trying to protect Rosemary’s daughter, but it was no use. They took her and that was the last time anyone had seen her. Her daughter explained that it was the aunties of her father that took her immediately to Sweden. The aunties then used her passport to kidnap other children and bring them to Sweden. The aunties mistreated her and kept her drugged most of the time. Whenever the daughter would ask about her mother, the aunties would tell her that they had no idea who her mother was and no contact information for her. Finally at 18 years old, the daughter ran away from the aunties’ house in Sweden and was found by Swedish social workers. The daughter was incredibly sick when they found her. She had sickle cell anemia and needed immediate intense treatment. These social workers probably saved her life. They helped her get educated and find a job. Now in the last few years they have been helping her find her mother. During the time when Rosemary was fasting and praying in Uganda, one social worker in Sweden asked if she could send her name to a pastor she knew in Uganda on the outside chance he might be able to find a woman named Rosemary Amony. The pastor that Swedish woman sent the daughter’s name to was in fact Rosemary’s pastor.

As Rosemary finished telling this incredible story, we all had big tears rolling down our cheeks. It was unbelievable…after 25 years God had managed to connect a widow without a phone with her daughter living thousands of miles away in Sweden. I watched Rosemary as she cried…it wasn’t a defeated cry, but one of incredible power. As she reached her hands to heaven and smiled through her tears, she really did look like a tree of life.

A True Warrior

“For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realm.” Ephesians 6:12

When you think of a warrior…you think of bulging biceps and of a menacing face. Someone you could count on to protect you in any and all situations…someone fearless and aggressive. To a warrior fighting is just like breathing…as natural to living as eating and sleeping. They are born to dominate and to never take no for answer. Hollywood reinforces this definition of a warrior, but I am beginning to think that it isn’t really who a true warrior is. This week God showed me a different kind of warrior…maybe the truest kind of warrior there is.

A couple weeks ago, Nancy came to the widows meeting and sat near the back. During the meeting she didn’t say much, but her face spoke volumes. The stress and pain in her eyes was screaming out her trouble. After the meeting, she pulled Suzan aside and told her that she had not eaten yesterday and that she would not be able to feed her children that night either. In an instant Suzan put her arm around Nancy and without any fanfare or many words, she gave her the equivalent of $15. Nancy stared speechless at the money in her hand for a moment and then started to cry. Not a sweet cry, but one of incredible shock and relief. Big tears streamed down her face and she buried her head in her hands. That $15 gave her relief from the agony of not being able to feed her children and of not eating herself. You see Nancy is HIV positive and taking the drugs on an empty stomach causes her incredible discomfort and pain. Not the mention the pain a mother endures as she watches her children suffer. As I watched her hold Susan and cry, I cried too. It was beautiful to see someone in pain be comforted.

I met Nancy again last night. This time she entered the widows meeting with her mouth twitching as if the words were just fighting to come out. After greeting each other, she immediately asked if she could share a story with the group. Nancy began to speak very quickly in her language and with great expression. She said that about a month ago an elderly woman had been chased from the home she was renting because she had fallen sick and could not pay the rent. The old woman walked out of the little room she could no longer afford and sat in the dust and cried while the neighbors looked on. Nancy broke through the crowd and asked the woman what had happened and tried to comfort her. The woman told her that although she was 65 she had started to bleed again. She tries to keep herself clean, but she seems to weaken every day. Nancy immediately wondered if the woman had cervical cancer. Nancy lives in a two-roomed house with her children, as it is they live on top of each other and they struggle to eat every day. But that never entered her mind.

“I follow Jesus,” Nancy told the woman, “So you can stay with me and I will take care of you.” She then picked the woman up and helped her into the house. After entering into the house she realized that the woman smelled of dried blood and urine. With her daughter helping her, she bathed the woman and washed her clothes. Now for the last month and a half, she has been caring for this woman every day…all the time. She has tried to get some little extra money to bring the woman to the hospital to get tested for cancer. So, here she was at the meeting begging the Dorcas Widows Fund to help this poor woman. Nancy looked at us and said, “This woman is the one who is truly suffering.” I wondered how she defined suffering…Nancy gets sores from HIV and is sick often, she struggles to feed her family, pay house rent and take care of her children. She continued to plead of this woman. She told us that as of now the woman’s only health care is her prayers over her at night; which, as I was about to find out are as powerful as any medicine any doctor could give.

After we agreed to help her help this woman, Nancy said, “Oh, I have one more prayer request.” She said as if it was a commonplace prayer request…something people always ask for. “At about 9 o’clock last night I heard a commotion outside my home. It was so loud that my daughter and I decided to find out what was happening.” As Nancy, stepped outside she was horrified to see two men beating a 15-year-old girl with their rosaries. She ran to the girl and asked the men why they were beating her. The men said, “Stay back. This girl is possessed by demons. She is talking in many different voices and is trying to hit, kick and bite other people. Just let us handle it.” Nancy stood her ground and calmly said, “Gentlemen, please let me handle this for you. I am born again and I can rid this girl of the demons.” The men shook their heads, but allowed her to take control of the situation. At that point Matilda, another Dorcas Widow, joined Nancy and they began to pray in full force. The demons first laughed at her and told her that “We are 30 and you are only two. What can you do to us?" She responded by saying that Jesus had given her full authority over them and that the blood of Jesus was enough to battle them with. Matilda and Nancy prayed and battled for this girl’s soul until midnight. Finally, all the demons left the girl and the girl came back to her senses. At that point both Nancy and Matilda shared the love of Christ with the girl and her mother. They both decided to become followers of Jesus. “So, please pray with Matilda and I as we continue to share Jesus with this girl and her mother.”

I stared at her in complete amazement. At first I didn’t even know what to say. Then I asked her if she was scared when she encountered this demon-possessed girl. She looked at me strangely as if my question was completely bizarre. Then she said, “No, Kari, God told us that we have power over demons. There is nothing they can do to us. Isn’t that what Jesus told us we should do?” I just nodded my head.

I spent the rest of the meeting looking at this HIV positive woman wearing old worn out clothes realizing that this is what a true fearless warrior looks like. She battles hunger in her house…sickness in her body…sadness in her inability to provide for her children and demons in the community…but the key is she doesn’t go into battle alone. Jesus…her protector, her lover, her friend, her powerful ally goes with her everywhere she goes. With human eyes she is only wearing a faded blue skirt, a blouse missing a couple buttons and shoes that barely fit, but in God’s eyes she is covered in the full armor of God. She has a beautiful belt of truth buckled around her waist, a shiny golden breastplate of righteousness and a solid shield of faith, which will extinguish all the fiery arrows of the evil one. She is one of the most beautiful warriors I have ever seen and also one of the most fierce.