Scandalous Forgiveness in Zambia

I want to introduce you to a woman named Rebecca. Her face shines with joy that the years she has lived cannot erase. She has little wisps of gray hair poking out from behind the kerchief beautifully tied around her head. I met her the morning of Wednesday, August 2nd as we all piled into a van heading out past the small town of Chingola. We were traveling a couple hours out into the Zambian countryside to a rural village. Rebecca told us proudly that is was the village she grew up in and the one she would eventually retire to. In order to know Rebecca, you have to know the path she has traveled to know Jesus.

Rebecca first heard about God as a young girl and prayed the sinner’s prayer when she was in 6th grade, but life went on and her faith seemed to dry up and be swallowed by weeds. She finished her high school education and got married. She then settled into the daily routine of raising children, cooking, cleaning, gardening and taking care of her husband. Life was busy with 7 children and left little time for cultivating a relationship with the Lord. In one dramatic turn of events her whole life as she knew it came to a screeching halt.

A friend in the village alerted her to the fact that her husband had been having an affair with another woman. Rebecca didn’t believe it and couldn’t imagine her husband breaking their wedding vows and leaving their children. She lived in denial for some time, until the truth just could not keep silent anymore. Her husband came home one day and demanded that she leave her house and all of her children. Rebecca was stunned and refused for some months, but her husband continued to go forward with his plan to marry this other woman. So, defeated, angry and wounded she left her home, her children and her husband and returned to her father. This new wife brought her five children to the Rebecca’s old home and did not treat her children with the same love and care she had once lavished on them.

Rebecca said that this was the darkest time of her life and that God felt so far out of reach. She became consumed with revenge and hatred. She visited a witch doctor to ask him to put spells on her husband and his new wife. She also began to save money so she could hire some thugs to beat up his new wife. Meanwhile, another woman named Elizabeth began to pray earnestly for Rebecca. Rebecca found out later that Elizabeth had fasted and spent nights praying that Elizabeth would come to know Jesus as her lover and friend. I paused at this point in the story to marvel at how God uses love to woo us out of darkness.

Some time after Elizabeth began to shake the gates of heaven on Rebecca’s behalf, Rebecca found herself alone at her father’s house. She stood up to begin sweeping when she said an overwhelming urge came over her to drop to her knees and begin praying. She had not prayed or communicated to God for a long time, so this was out of the ordinary. As she prayed she poured her heart out to the Lord and confessed all of her rage, revenge, hurt and sadness. God came to her in that moment and soothed her aching heart. After she stood up, the Holy Spirit continued to ask her to go to Elizabeth’s house. Rebecca said that she absolutely refused to go visit her as she was terrified that this woman of God would shame her and reject her if she knew the depth of rage that had been in her heart. All day she tried to ignore the gentle whisper that commanded that she go to Elizabeth’s house. Finally, in late afternoon she could not stand it anymore and went to see her.

As she arrived at Elizabeth’s house they exchanged pleasantries and spoke of the weather. She made sure to avoid any conversation that would lead to what had happened to her this morning. Then as she stood to leave, Elizabeth looked deep into her eyes and noticed a difference. “What has happened to you?” she asked. At that point Rebecca could not hold it in any longer. All that she had confessed earlier to the Lord came spilling out as Elizabeth knelt with her on the floor of her hut. Elizabeth then began to praise the Lord for his rescue and for the forgiveness he had showered down upon her. As Elizabeth praised the Lord, Rebecca tried to crawl out of the room, as she wasn’t sure she could take much more. Isn’t it funny how scary the enemy can make God’s healing look like to us? However, Elizabeth gently held her shoulder and said, “this is a child of God and evil has no place here.” At that point a rush of healing and joy flooded her body and spirit, which began her love affair with the Lord.

After this incredible encounter with God’s love, she felt this love well up in her and sill out the sides onto those around her. Filled with this extraordinary love, she went to her husband and his new wife and told them that Jesus had given her the ability to forgive them and invited them to greet her in the village. Shortly after that she began to tell the new wife about this crazy consuming love of Jesus. She even began to pray for her and befriend her. One day Rebecca was visiting the new wife asking her to join her at church. The new wife refused saying that she did not have a head covering to wear to the service. Rebecca immediately took her headscarf off and gave it to her. When they arrived at church, it was scandalous. The women were shocked that not only Rebecca would forgive this woman who stole her husband, but to give her a nice head scarf like that one. What a moment that must have been! I often forget how scandalous God’s grace really is.

As Rebecca finished this story of God’s rescue, I sat stunned as I knew somewhere in a quiet place within me that God was revealing something about himself through Rebecca’s story. I had wanted to know how God forgives, how God loves us, how to love others. I had been seeking an answer and as I sat there I felt like this story was one I would think about for some time. It would be something I roll around in my mind as I mine it for bits of Jesus. The savior’s personality, his very essence is interwoven in this personal story of God’s redemption. This story is not over for me. It will be one I replay over and over.

As Rebecca and I traveled the dusty bumpy road out to her village, I asked her why she had chosen to spend her life caring for orphans. She became very animated when I asked her this question, turned around in her seat and began another one of her life’s journeys. She was visiting her daughter in the bustling city of Ndola making up for all the lost time of her missed childhood. In order to help her daughter, she offered to go to the market. As she walked through the crowded market full of merchants, she caught the gaze of a small child sitting in the public toilet. It was odd to see a child sitting on the urine caked floor with no shoes and very little clothing. She immediately went to see her and found two scared little girls, two sisters—ages 4 and 7. These girls had been living in the public toilet alone for several weeks as their grandmother was at the local hospital with their youngest sister. The grandmother brought food when she could, but their youngest sister was quite ill and without the grandmother feeding her she would die. Can you imagine the horrible choice this grandmother had to make—be with her dying grandchild or be with her two young sisters? Rebecca said that her heart broke in two as she stood in the stench of the public toilet and she began to weep. She then took the girls back to her daughter’s house to get cleaned up, to get clean clothes and to eat. After speaking with the children’s grandmother, she took them back to her village out past Chingola. Since that time the youngest sister has fully recovered and the grandmother is now living with them in the village. The two oldest are still quite small due to a severe lack of nourishment, but they are in school and being cared for by Jeremiah’s church.

Finally, we had reached the village and I could hear the loud cheering and squeals from the children who had followed our van to Jeremiah’s house. As Rebecca and I climbed out of the van, she grabbed my hand and I looked down to see three small girls smiling up at me. “These are the ones I found in the toilet.” Rebecca said softly. I looked at them and tears began to well up in my eyes. I turned and looked deep into Rebecca’s eyes. Her’s were red and moist too. Without speaking Rebecca grabbed me in a tight bear hug and we sobbed on each other’s shoulder. It was the first of the holy moments I would experience. Time seemed to stand still and God seemed so close. Here in the middle of the African bush in a small village an African woman and a privileged white woman from the west held each other and cried for the orphans who live in toilets, for the children who go to bed without anyone to tuck them in, for the widows and grandmothers who have to make unspeakable choices. Some how God was trying to communicate something about himself in that moment and I don’t want to be too quick to decide what it is.